When I had Aiden I was only 18. I was young and scared and was not sure how I was going to handle being a mother. As Aiden grew I learned. I watched him and realized that mothering was something that came quite naturally. I realized something watching Aiden grow that had never occurred to me before. My mother was human. She was not some super women who was taught how to handle every situation before it came. She was instructed on how to raise me step by step.
For a long time I held a lot of things against her. I began to realize that many of the mistakes she made anyone could have made. I cannot say that I have forgiven her for everything. With the realization she was human I also realized how powerful the love of a child is. Sometimes I think back to the things I went through growing up. Things were not always handled in the best way. Seeing how much I love Aiden and everything I would do for him it is hard to understand what she was thinking sometimes.
I guess you learn as you go. Maybe one day I will understand.
2 comments:
There are a lot of times when i think i know exactly what my mom was thinking and other times when i am like i have no clue. I always though she was some well trained machine who arose at 5 am to cook and get us off to school but it turns out she was just, as you said, human. I had my first son at 19 and i wish more than anything she would have been here to help me through. Thanks for sharing. I totally get it.
Hey Cassie!
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